


Tomato Paste IS Necessary for Chili, Scott, You Utter Plebe

by Wintertree



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Human, Fluff, M/M, Momma's Boy Derek Hale, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-01
Updated: 2014-10-01
Packaged: 2018-02-19 11:49:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2387210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wintertree/pseuds/Wintertree
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One Stiles Stilinski is not a god-fearing boy, but he does hold a couple things to be sacred truths:</p>
<p>1) Bro’s before ho’s — ok stop looking at me like that, Lydia, it’s an expression of placing friendship over romantic relationships, ok? You’re a bro, not a ho. Yes, that was meant to be a compliment.<br/>2) Melissa McCall’s famous bean chili (made specially for potlucks and school events) is a modern day ambrosia and must be treated with respect and reverence.<br/>3) The basketball team is somehow a bunch of bigger assholes than the lacrosse team, which actually says a lot.</p>
<p>So it isn’t very surprising when Scott and Kira find Stiles in a glaring match with the senior basketball captain, Derek Hale, over the last can of tomato paste.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tomato Paste IS Necessary for Chili, Scott, You Utter Plebe

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Scerek prompt by a kind anon on tumblr: "Both need the last of something at the grocery store au."
> 
> Unbeta-ed, so all mistakes are my own. I obviously don't own any of the characters and I'm not profiting from this. If anything, I'm losing money and sanity writing about momma's boy nerds.
> 
> EDIT:  
> To the anon: chill. Sorry not sorry about my twisted, perverted fantasies of Derek blushing at Scott in the canned foods aisle. It's an AU, therefore I don't have to ascribe to canon relationships or sexual orientations (that's basic fanfic conventions, not a product of my ~rampant heterophobia~). Find your chill.

One Stiles Stilinski is not a god-fearing boy, but he does hold a couple things to be sacred truths:

  1. **Bro’s before ho’s**  — _ok_ stop _looking at me like that, Lydia, it’s an expression of placing friendship over romantic relationships, ok? You’re a bro, not a ho. Yes, that was meant to be a compliment._
  2. **Melissa McCall’s famous bean chili (made specially for potlucks and school events) is a modern day ambrosia and must be treated with respect and reverence.**
  3. **The basketball team is somehow a bunch of bigger assholes than the lacrosse team, which actually says a lot**.



So it isn’t very surprising when Scott and Kira find Stiles in a glaring match with the senior basketball captain, Derek Hale, over the last can of tomato paste. 

"I don’t care why you need it, Stiles—" _  
_

"Obviously you’ve never tasted Mrs. McCall’s chili, which pretty much explains the shitty attitude."

"—but fuck you, I was here first."

"Wow, mature reaction, Derek, I’m really very— hey! Scott, Kira, get over here and back me up." Seeing Scott approach, Derek’s eyes widen and his jaw drops minutely. Stiles flails his arms, nearly knocking over a couple cans of corn. The distraction helps Derek recover from staring at Scott’s crooked (handsome) jawline, now close enough for him to reach out and touch. 

Derek, standing beside his shopping cart, fixes Stiles with a cold glare. The younger boy isn’t dissuaded, although Kira has the decency to look sheepish.

"Um, if he was here first?" Kira pipes up. This time Stiles’ frustrated flailing  _does_  knock over a can of corn. Scott, bless his soul, shares Stiles’ same first truth of brother’s before others’s ( _better now,_   _Lyds_?).

"Hey Derek, we go to school together. I’m Scott. We’re actually helping out the lacrosse potluck tomorrow and we really need that paste for my mom’s chili?"

"I know who you are, Scott," Derek mumbles.

"What?" 

"C’mon, Scotty," Stiles says, "just flash him with your sad puppy eyes and get the can."

Snapping his eyes to Stiles (not that he’s avoiding looking at Scott, honest), Derek grits his teeth. “No. I need it for dinner. And I was here first,” he finishes petulantly.

"It’s the last item on our shopping list and we need it tonight. Can’t you just let us have it?" Scott says. A tiny furrow forms in his brow and Derek wants to smooth it out. Preferably with his mouth.

Derek wavers, but the smug grin on Stiles’ face pushes him over the edge.

"No."

He puts the Hunt's can in his cart and starts to exit the aisle. Squawking, Stiles jumps in front of the cart and braces against it.

“ _Stiles_.”

"Dude, please, I’ve been dying for this chili since August and I  _need_  to have it. I’ll give you money. I even pay for the rest of your groceries, it’s that worth it.” Stiles squints down at the items in the cart. “Wait, are these your groceries?”

Next to the can of tomato paste, Derek has two loaves of white bread, a hunk of cheddar cheese, three cans of tomato soup, box of Goldfish, Puffs Plus with Lotion Tissues (spring themed), Vaseline, and lemon flavored cough drops in the cart.

"Wasn’t Cora out sick today?" Kira asks. Derek shrugs, applying his best apathetic face.

"And Mom."

"And so you’re making them dinner?" says Scott.

Derek tenses and focuses on Scott through gritted teeth. “Obviously. My mom used to make me grilled cheese and tomato soup when I was sick as a kid, do you really think I wouldn’t help out my family when they needed me?”

"No, I just," Scott stammers, "I didn’t think that. I’d do the same thing for my mom — I just thought it was really sweet of you."

"Oh."

Derek blinks a couple times and slaps his nonchalant face back on, but his ears are tinged bright pink. “Thanks.” Scott blushes. Kira, who’s been intentionally staying out of the drama, thinks it’s all very cute. Stiles thinks it’s disgusting.

"So…" Stiles leads.

"Stiles!"

"Here. Have it." Derek tosses the can to Stiles, albeit a little harder than he has to. "Cora likes her soup less thick than I do anyways."

"Dude, you should keep it for your family," Scott says with an almost unfairly earnest and adorable expression.

"It’s ok." Derek bumps his cart against Stiles, earning him a muttered curse. Walking backward out of the aisle, he smirks at Scott and says, "As much as they suck compared to the basketball team" —earning another curse from Stiles— "I can’t deprive the lacrosse team from Melissa McCall’s legendary chili."

"Wait," Scott says slowly, "how do you know my mom’s name?"

Derek freezes, horrified.

"Gotta get OJ!" Derek blurts, voice cracking on the first word. In a blink of an eye, Derek’s gone.

The three friends stay silent for a moment.

"See, Scott, that’s the reason why we’re never gonna try out for the basketball team, even if Coach kills us with suicides. Never trust a man whose wardrobe is exclusively basketball shorts and leather jackets," Stiles says, cradling the tomato paste in his arms.

"He’s not that bad, Stiles."

"Of course he’s… no.  _No._  Bad Scott. I know that tone of voice and I fervently  _hate_  it. I’m not dealing with another Allison Situation.”

"We should check out," Scott mumbles, grabbing the rest of their items and making their way to the cash register. Stiles trails after him, whining about how he’s going to lose his brother to an other. Neither boy notices as Kira splinters off.

— x —

Kira finds Derek by the frozen waffles, crouched on the floor with his head in his hands.

"So," she says cheerfully.

Derek moans in response.

"Well, um, I volunteered to serve chili tomorrow, but I think I’m going to be busy. With my dad. Or homework. But basically I need someone to cover for me?"

Derek glares half-heartedly up at her. “Ok?”

"Think you can help me?" she pauses, "I was gonna share a shift with Scott. A whole hour. He’d really appreciate you helping me out."

Derek falls back into his hands, ears bright pink once again. Kira lets up a short squeal and punches him lightly on the shoulder. “Great! Be there at 2pm. Tell Cora to get better and to pick out your outfit.”

Kira skips off, texting someone on her phone.

After a long moment, Derek drags himself up and smiles all the way to the cartons of OJ.


End file.
